i can live.

i woke into a panic state
when i thought the time
had passed for me
and he walked into a solid room
said, excuse me sir
then he asked for me
and i wept

he turned his head and saw me there
i looked away
then he came by and shared
a smile that made me wish
that i was dead
then a quiet calm came over my head

the same day that your heart went numb
i decided to be free
so i took a bus to where i was
before you took hold of me
and i left

i didn't choose it
why can't i lose it
take it away.

but i came back and took my place
beside you and held on for two
and nothing i said seemed to penetrate
your ears or chisel through
your mind

i didn't choose it
why can't i lose it
take it away

i have tried
all these years
to decide
who i am
now i know
i can live
my own way

i didn't choose it
why can't i lose it
take it away